April 10, 2012

Why I'm A Jerk

"A jerk if I've ever seen one."
(Some of you already know why I'm a jerk. This is just one more example of why.)

Our whole family got on the subway after a fun lunch date at Burger King. The subway wasn’t incredibly packed, which was good. Throughout our trip home our family all ended up getting seats (with me standing next to them holding the stroller with the boys). The only thing that was wrong with the picture was that a man sat in the middle of our family separating Ellie, Aubrey, Caleb, Sammie and I, from Heather, Lily and Sydney. In my mind this young guy was being selfish for not moving and letting us sit together.

I was annoyed. 

I’m just looking at this scene and thinking how simple and obvious is it that this guy should offer me a seat so we can sit together as a family. I let Heather know of my bad attitude. Then something happened that changed the story. Something I didn’t expect. 

When the young man got up to get off at his stop, I noticed that he limped to the door. That’s when I was reminded that I’m a jerk. Why am I a jerk? Because, I judged this guy’s actions and I shouldn’t have. In my mind it was simple. He was taking up a spot that made sense for him to give to us. In my mind it was because he was selfish and unconcerned with my family. So when I realized he had a limp the story opened up a little bit.

Maybe it’s not easy for him to walk, maybe he’s in a lot of pain, maybe he’s ashamed. All of these are reasons that make sense; I just didn’t know them when I judged him and his actions/motives.

We shouldn't judge for many reasons, but one is because we don’t know the whole story. Only God knows every detail. Let's withhold judgement in our relationships. With our spouse, our kids, our friends and even strangers.

And you know what judgment also does, it divides us. I can’t love someone I’m judging. Plain. And simple. More on why I’m a jerk another day. 

What are your thoughts about judgment and love? 

much love, 
the petersons


  1. Anonymous13.4.12

    Long for the day that my first response is grace..... great post!

    1. Thank you so much! I also long for that day! -Matt